BIGG,

the first time i met you was at a lily pond.

we floated in the middle and you sheltered me from the thoughts

that tell me i must believe what i see in their eyes about me.

i believe what i see in your eyes about me

we made plans for an adventure

reckless adventure impeccably planned

that’s me when im with you

that’s us.

and you’re always with me

you are and have always been

in the hands that teach me

the eyes that see me

the presence that steadies me

when i say i always come back what i mean is

you keep pulling me out of the ashes

watering the soil with my tears

remaking me

that’s how you taught me trust.

let’s talk about trust.

when i see no more light

and do not feel the ground beneath my feet

trusting you is all that is left

when i begin to blossom and i quake in fear at what it means

all that will be risked

and lost

and changed

and forgotten

trusting you is the first sustenance

you’re the reason and the mechanism by which i return

again and again

changed and the same

again and again

remembering every time i forget

that with you i never leave in the first place

you’re always here

all i need to do is

unclench my fists

fall

this text is quite personal and profound to me

so i will leave it here in one big block for you to experience in one go

and since we are on the topic

i write these texts (all the text on this website) in a kind of flow

as unedited as possible

intentionally

i focus on it and let it flow

i hope you enjoy it? i guess i hope you feel it actually

that’s more important than enjoying

i’ll add some projects below

think earth and clay

stereotomic lol